A brief but meaningful ceremony was held at the groundbreaking for the proposed assisted living facility off Pine Street this morning. Mr. Komatsu was summoned to the podium and creaked his aching joints up the ramps to accept his Lifetime Achievement award for Excellence in Excavation. Although his toothless speech and antiquated jargon were difficult to decipher, everyone in attendance was impressed with his impeccable record of ripping shale, hogging out fill, and trenching pipelines across the Garden State. No longer able to handle the cobbles, boulders, and coarse debris of northern New Jersey, Mr. Komatsu has been assigned to a pipe crew on the south shore of Long Island, where he can labor with ease in the glacial outwash south of the terminal moraine. Mr. Komatsu, we salute you!
March 27, 2019